Where do I even begin? What do I say about this type of connection? There’s so much to say!
Back in July one of my energy healers suggested to me that a dynamic that I had been playing out with a man in my life was a twin flame connection. She just tossed it up as a suggestion, which I respect because then I get to go dig and decide for myself.
I’d heard of the word twin flame before. Just like I’d heard of karmic relationships and soul mate relationships. But I never paid any attention to twin flames. I just dismissed it when it would come across my path. I guess I never thought of myself as having one.
So when that was suggested to me I started to think about it. Question it in my life. I began to learn about this type of relationship. I’d only heard bad things like they are really hard and triggering and you want to rip your heart out and it makes no sense why you can’t get the person out of your head and all of that. That didn’t sound fun to me so I dismissed it.
So what is a twin flame?
In my understanding of learning about them and in my own downloads I believe a twin flame to be the mirror of your soul. A lot of people have the opinion that it’s the other ½ of your soul, but I believe our souls are whole, so I believe that we are souls that come from the same soul family and we are direct reflections of one another. We make this contract with each other before coming in.
By being a direct reflection it means when we are with them, if we have not healed our deep wounds then all of that comes up to mirror it back to us for healing and ascension. This is why this type of relationship is so triggering and even more so if you don’t have an understanding of the true dynamic of it.
So it’s suggested to me that I might have a twin flame and thus begins my search for the truth of what that really means.
I mean I’m almost speechless. I have fought this, resisted it, thought it was so stupid, thought it was just an excuse people found to be obsessive and attached. I was like NO in all caps! This isn’t for me.
I was in complete resistance to it for several months. I was mad about it even. It kept coming up through different sources, it kept beating down my door. I kept getting crazy signs about it and I see 11:11 all the time. I finally started to let my resistance go on it.
I mainly had to stop judging. That was the biggest thing. I was judging him and I was judging me. I had to stop.
I was judging him for being all the things my triggers thought him to be and I was judging me for being attached and obsessed. I mean I could not get this person out of my mind no matter how hard I tried. And I haven’t been able to get him out of my mind since I met this person.
It’s wild because you begin to think something is wrong with you.
Like you barely know the person, yet you have this incredible connection and chemistry that’s like no other. But you think it’s just one sided like you’re the only one feeling it or experiencing it. So then you think you’re even crazier because what if the other person could care less. I mean you guys it is the mental battle of your life.
Embarking on the twin flame journey is not for the weak or faint at heart. It’s been the hardest most intense feelings I’ve ever had and they are hard to explain. When I see him with someone else is like putting a knife in my heart and twisting it up. I can’t explain it and yet the pain is so deep.
I first wanted to understand how I would even know if this was a TF connection. I watched lots of videos on YouTube, read lots of blogs and articles, connected with Instagram and Facebook accounts on the subject. And then I’d get so mad at every thing I was reading and hearing. Oh it triggered me so much!
Ultimately the knowing comes down to you and your inner guidance.
I would ask for signs all the time and get them and still doubt! I just didn’t want to believe it. I’m like no! it’s not so.
I remember one day I had put on FB if anyone knew anything about Twin Flames, and I had some responses. I then had a conversation with my friend Buttercup & in her wisdom she said I can’t say for sure because it’s for you to decide and know, but I feel strongly that he is and he’s going to contact you soon. I was like no he never reaches out.
Well I had been seeing 11:11 constantly for a couple of days. The next morning I had an energy clearing session and when I finished I popped open my instagram account and there was a message from him! I was shocked, I laid my phone down to crack my egg and it was a double yoked egg! What! To me the Universe sends us crazy signs like that.
I’ve had others, that are equally as crazy. Like him appearing in my dreams and then he’ll text. I’ve had crazy synchronicity’s happen over and over.
Videos like this and many others were ones I watched in order to gain a better understanding about the signs of TF’s.
So what was my first clue that I could have a twin? Well I’m on a spiritual ascension journey. I’m here to heal myself, my ancestral lineage and future generations. I am a seeker and I am a healer. And I have a great call on my life…a mission.
People on that path that have to heal deep wounds from this life-time and any previous life times will likely have a twin flame. Why? Because this relationship dynamic is the only one that can trigger deep healing. There’s no other man on the planet that could have triggered me to this degree. And because I was seeking already I began to heal these wounds.
And this type of relationship differs from karmic relationships.
Karmic relationships are very tumultuous and hard, they are often times aggravating and unhealthy, but they don’t trigger us like a twin flame relationship does. And the difference with karmic and twin flame is that even though the TF triggers the heck out of both people there’s still unspoken love and caring for the other person. There’s just kindness still always present.
A karmic relationship isn’t like that. In my karmic relationship there was no kindness and when it’s done it’s done. And you’re grateful and you don’t look back. I had a karmic relationship for 6 years. I was constantly triggered, but not my deep core wounds. I was triggered because it was so unhealthy and I didn’t know what to do. I wanted it to work, but it just wasn’t gonna.
A twin flame connection is incredibly triggering until you heal your deep wounds and ascend to a higher frequency that can support the union. The rewards of this relationship comes when you heal. And one person healing helps the other to heal and ascend.
I was confused about how this was possible at first until I got another download and understanding of the power of frequency and energy. This is why distance energy healers are able to do their work, because they are doing it in the 5D realm. When you heal yourself, you’re affecting your TF on the 5th dimension.
So let me address triggers…
What do I mean by this? I’ll give you an example from me personally. Rejection, not being chosen, not being enough, and trust issues were at the core of my deepest wounds in relationship.
So when my twin (the person who I think is my twin) would come in to my life he would trigger every single one of those insecurities. I would lash out and push away and he would run from the situation because his own deep core wounds would also be triggered.
Then in his own triggered wounds would do something that I would interpret and project as me not being enough, not chosen, wanted and that I couldn’t trust him. And this would then propel me to seek healing.
One other thing I want to mention before I close this up is the self judgment.
I was constantly criticizing myself for being attached and crazy because I could not get him out of my mind. I tried so hard. I put separation in between us for a year ½. I honestly thought I’d never see him again. And this was before I knew about TF, but even with a year ½ of separation, I still always thought of him and wondered how he was doing.
Like you legit think you’re nuts. And the other thing is that all those fancy quotes about if he’s in to you he’ll do this… or what ever don’t apply to this situation.
You guys we are no longer operating in 3 D linear fashion.
The way things were yesterday are no longer that way. We are operating in a multi-dimensional Universe where we are able with enough spiritual growth and activation to tap into higher dimensions and play on those levels.
So coming to grips with the old no longer applying is a tough one. But we have to or otherwise we’ll go crazy.
If you’re on a spiritual journey and you have a twin out there you can heal yourself and heal your twin. The only way is to raise your frequency and vibration. To think loving thoughts towards the other person instead of judgment. To honor yourself in the process. To Trust the process which has been the hardest thing because I’ve had trust issues to heal to begin with.
But if you are spiritually tapped in you’ll always be guided by your impulse. You’ll always be shown signs to help you trust and keep your faith.
One last sign I saw yesterday.
I was doing a walking meditation yesterday on 11/11/11 (2018) and I walked to the top of the mountain and found the word HOPE spelled out in rocks. My grandmother’s name was Hope and it was like she was saying hi, keep the faith, you’re doing great. You’re ascending just fine and this is all happening for you. You signed up for this growth, you signed up to love and heal.
So the union of the twin flame is what everyone is talking about in the TF community.
Apparently when you heal your stuff and you can actually be in Union it’s the most blissful, love filled, sex filled, satisfying relationship you can dream of. Usually when a TF does come into union it’s also because they will be in service to others for their own ascension and spiritual growth.
There’s usually a mission that the two embark on because they have transcended lower frequencies and are here to help others do the same. The ultimate mission of this connection is unconditional love. Unconditional love of self and of each other. It is also meant for the awakening of the divine masculine and divine feminine.
So yeah, that’s a lot. As for me I’m staying in my own lane right now, continuing to grow spiritually, continuing to raise my frequency, to vibrate higher and step more and more into purpose and mission, with or without my twin in my life. I just send him love and blessings anytime he pops into my head.
Because here’s what I know, some one will join me on this journey. Just not sure who it is, and letting go of the attachment that it has to be a specific person is the most freeing thing I can do for myself.
If you have questions about this let me know!